We gotta admit…us girls don’t know jack about football. But we know how to fuck and we know how to say just the right words to make you CUM!
And at least we can Google to see who’s playing, right? ;)
Category Archives: Phone Sex
Slut Problems!
Ok so im calling this blog Slut Problems, cuz that’s what I think ive got! Its like every time I go to a party or something, my bestie is MAD at me! Every SINGLE time! So shes Asian and pretty uptight and shes got this really REALLY jealous boyfriend, so she has to be SUPER careful when so goes out the she doesn’t talk to other guys and stuff so anyway, im single and DON’T GIVE A FUCK so of course im going to FLIRT and shit! Why not?!!!! Im on the damn prowl and that should be fine and its no ones business AT ALL! And the fucked up shit is that she USED to be JUST like me! Worse, even! I swear, the stories I have on her! She knows!!! So anyways no one should be caring, but shes always over the corner, giving me those EYES you know which I mean…
So last weekend were drunk at a party and im sitting on this super hot guys lap, and im flirting and having fun, and shes over there looking all pissy. And this party is like super dark, and there were definitely people on drugs and stuff, and this guy CLEARLY has a giant cock. I swear that when it started getting hard, I was literaly rising up with it! So im sitting on this giant cock, and the only thing between me and it is his jeans and my panties, really, since my skirt is so short. This guy is kinda sleazy, but I kinda like that honestly. And so I was, you know, sorta rubbing my ass on his a bit, bouncing a bit, totally trying to drive him nuts. And it worked of course! But it also drove my friend nuts too, cuz she came over and grabbed my hand and said we needed to leave. And then it finaly hit me! She was JEALOUS! And not JUST jealous that I can fuck whoever I want, but also jealous that I was spending my attention on someone else! Like she felt left out or something!
So I took her hand and literaly put it on my tit! I just took it and slid it down my shirt and under my bra real quick and the next thing we both know her hands on my tit! Im not even sure what I expected honestly. But she didn’t pull her hand away! So I thought fuck it, and put MY hand up HER shirt too! And I had always thought she had cute breasts, and I was shocked that it kinda turned me on to hold one. My tits are pretty big (full C’s) and really soft…but she felt different. They were small but super firm. They sorta just stood out from her chest like gumdrops or something. Her nipple was really hard, and I just ran my thumb over it gently, and even through all the blasting music, I totally heard her make a little breath sound. Like, a SEXY sound, ya know?
So I pulled her a little closer, more into the shadows of the corner we were in, and lifted her shirt up over her tits. They were SO CUTE! I couldn’t help it- my mouth went to one, then the other. The guy under me groaned- I almost forgot about him at that point!
So I ground into my with my pussy, pressing down hard on his lap as I sucked her titties. She started to pull away cuz I think she started to get scared I think that someone would see, but it was really dark in there and no one gave a fuck anyways so I wasn’t worried. I pulled her closer, flicking her nipples with my tongue. When I ran my hand up her skirt and pulled aside her panties, she was totally wet! Dirty little lesbian liar! She told me she wasn’t into girls! Right!
I slid a finger in her pussy. Two. Three. Before I knew it I was totally fucking her with my fingers while I sucked on her tits. Dude suddenly lifts me up a bit and I hear his jean unzip, then he’s tugging my panties to the side. Next thing I know, his cock is inside me and he’s bouncing me on it as I slide my fingers in and out of my bestie, the whole time also sucking on her tits. If she was gonna be jealous it was my job to make her feel included, ya know? But I admit I liked this way more than I thought. And for reals this guys cock feels HUGE inside me. I mean I never actually SAW it be it had to be one of the biggest ive ever ridden for sure! And wait…so heres the best part! My bestie starts whimpering and I know shes gonna cum, and just thinking about her cuming all over my fingers while this strange guys cock is inside me make me start to cum. And that makes the DUDE start to cum too! No shit! So shes shaking and her pussy is vibrating on my hand and im sucking her left tit HARD and she cums and then my pussy starts to constrict around his cock and I cum, and then he’s lifting me up and snatching his cock out of me as HE comes, pumping into his hand, trying not to make a total mess of this freaking club were in. (Gross!)
Then it got SUPER WEIRD. Like, she pulled her shirt back down, and her skirt back down, and told me we needed to leave. And it was late so I was like whatever, and we got an Uber home and I didn’t even give the guy my number. And can you believe this shit IN THE UBER my bestie turns to me and says im too slutty and I need to tone it down! I could NOT believe it! Less than 5 mins after shes cuming on me, shes telling ME I need to tone it down? Nope! I told her shes lucky I don’t tell her boyfee! Hed dump her in a second!
God she drives me nuts sometimes but im not gonna lie. I really liked fucking her! I would SO do it again! How do I get my friend to just dump this jerk and be a slut like me?! Now the bitch hasn’t called me in a week so well see what happens! Lol Maybe I should blackmail her into fucking me? Im kidding. Kind of.
Or I might be needing a new best friend soon! :/
-“Kaycee”
Totally including a pic that best matches the moment!
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CONFESSION from a HORNY MILF!
So I’m the untypically typical “hot MILF” guys fantasize about. I’m 38, 5 foot 7 and 125 lbs, and really fit from years as a dancer and fitness model in Las Vegas. My breasts are still looking great– surprising for naturally large C’s, and my ass is perfection, because I still work out 5 days a week. I’m actually pretty cut, with a six-pack I love to flaunt and my thighs are divine in a super short skirt– not that I have occassion to wear them often. My skin looks 25. In short I’ve aged really, really well for a mom of 2!
Anyway, my sons are teenagers now, and there is not ONE friend of theirs they’ve brought over who hasn’t eyed up my breasts and ass half-drooling, eyes aglow. Now that his friends are 16-18, trust me– a few of them have actually had the audacity to make thinly-veiled comments about wanting me, which is of course flattering. And I’m not going to lie– when I catch one of his hot football buddies staring down into my cleavage, it makes me instantly wet. I’ve been divorced for 5 years now, and I’ve hardly dated. For a long time, I didn’t even THINK about sex. Then I decided to secretly work from home as phone sex operator. It’s actually been amazing in helping me open up more sexually. But the bad part is, it just makes you want MORE and MORE sex! Then my son started turning into a man, and these hot young studs come over to hang out with him, and I find my pussy is LITERALLY THROBBING at the idea of fucking one of them. I mean, shit- I was married for 10 years– I didn’t have a lot of time to sew my oats out there. And these young guys…OMG! Their rock-hard bodies and young cocks…it’s literally TORTURE!
Like, the other day, my favorite (because he’s fucking HOT) of my son’s friends was over for dinner. I was bending over, getting a roast out of the back of the oven. I knew he was behind me, and I knew he could probably see the line of my g-string through the taupe pants I was wearing. As I reached into the heat, I could literally FEEL his eyes on my ass and pussy. When I stood up with the roast in my hands, he subtly licked his lips and said “that looks DELICIOUS, Ms. __________. I can’t wait to taste it.” I knew what he meant! My son was oblivious, flipping channels in the living room. My god, I wanted to fuck him so bad. And he wanted to fuck me so bad. I wanted to strip that 18 year-old body down and feel that tanned skin. I wanted to lick his six pack. I wanted to put his 18 year-old cock in my mouth and suck it like no silly teen girl has ever sucked it before. I wanted him to fuck my ass– at that age, he might not have even tried it yet— yes…I wanted my tight little asshole to be the first one his cock ever got to shoot a load in! I feel terrible because for a fleeting second, I wished my son would disappear so I could ravage this piece of meat then and there. But all I could do was answer “You KNOW you’re always welcome have dinner here, or even stay the night,” I said with a smile.
The moment I said it, I knew SOMETHING was going to happen soon! Sure enough, there was an away game for _____’s soccer team and it would require us leaving the house at 5:00am in order to make it. When my son asked if his friend, let’s just pretend his name is Mark, could sleep over and ride with us, of course I said yes. But then, what do you do? All night, every time we passed each other in the hall, or when I came in to bring them popcorn, our eye met and silently begged for each other. It got so bad that I went upstairs and had to use my vibrator or I thought I’d go nuts. And what was I thinking, anyway? I can’t FUCK my son’s friend! I climbed into bed that night determined to forget this crazy obsession.
Sometime later, I awoke in the darkness, and there he was, at the side of my bed. “Is it OK, Ms. ________…if I climb in bed with you?”
“YES” I said, pulling back the covers to reveal my naked body. He was wearing only boxers, and his cock was making them tent out, already hard. Not only hard, but wow– he had a big package! He crawled over me, lowering his shorts until his giant young cock popped out of them, bobbing in my face. Without saying a word, I put my mouth around it and swallowed it to the balls. “Ughhhhhhhhh” he moaned as I bobbed up and down, slurping thick, perfect young cock with more excitement than I’ve felt in years. But he was young so I didn’t want to push my luck and make him cum too quickly. “Fuck me” I demanded, laying back down and spreading my legs. My pussy was literally dripping now. When he took that fat pink head and pushed it inside me, I almost came instantly! I just kept thinking how YOUNG and how HOT he was…and how WRONG what we were doing was…and how AMAZING it felt! And for someone not old enough to have a ton of experience, he sure could fuck! He slowly drove that upwardly-curved cock in and out, guiding it deep inside me. But it wasn’t enough– somehow, I wanted MORE of him!
“Have you tried this before?” I asked him, grabbing his dick and pushing the head down lower, poking against my asshole.
“No…” he said, “almost apologetically. “Do you want to?” I asked him, “do you want to fuck me in my ass too?”
“GOD YES” he said, panting, pussy juice dripping from his cock.
“Let’s try it like this,” I told him, flipping over, pointing my ass at him, “just slide it in SLOWLY.”
He did as he was told, pushing that thick between my cheeks. My eyes rolled back into my head as he reached full penetration.
“That feels SO fucking good!” he said, squeezing my ass, holding me there.
“Now try it harder and faster” I said, “build up speed”.
He obeyed, and soon I could hear his moans increase.
“I’m gonna cum” he said.
“Cum deep in my ass” I told him. I pinched my clit between my fingers and arched my back into him. We both came so hard at the same time. My clit throbbing in time with his cock expelling his jizz deep inside me in bursts. I cannot remember the last time I felt so pleased.
I kissed him gently and got him to swear to tell no one, then shooed him back to bed before my son noticed he was missing. In the morning, I made them breakfast and we played it cool. I drove them to the game. As I was about to drive off (his parents would be picking them both up later) he knocked on the window.
“I forgot something” he said as my son kept walking.
“Yes?” I said.
“I forgot to tell you that you were the best fuck of my life so far, and I’m not stupid– I know you’re probably gonna feel guilty and say this can never happen again…but I CAN keep a secret and WILL do ANYTHING to fuck you again. Just think about it.”
Then he ran off and I drove away. That was last week. I haven’t seen him since, but he’s supposed to come over tonight to hang out and play video games with my son. CAN I REALLY DO THIS AGAIN? How can I not?! I KNOW it’s wrong, but fuck! This kid’s cock is the greatest thing to happen to me in years! I guess I just need to own it: I’m a horny MILF who loves to fuck young guys. Is that so wrong?
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The Virtual is Just as Real…
Call for erotic conversation,
Stay for the visuals…
Get lost in my voice
Explode into sexual pleasure.
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Fat Girls Are Sexy Too @1800PHONESEX
Is it still okay to say the word ‘fat’? Or should I say ‘thick and curvy’ or ‘bbw’ instead? I don’t know. Why do we have to be so damn PC if everyone is thinking it?? Whatever.
I’m constantly amazed by how much internet porn has grown to the point where there’s something for everyone – including those who love big women!
Enjoy this sexy GIF I stumbled upon today and yes…we do have sexy, BIG women at 1-800PHONESEX!
Call now if you’re a chubby chaser! ;)
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Flashback to January 2006 – Rockstar Magazine
If you think about it, the world hasn’t changed much. Sure, magazines aren’t as popular as they used to be – they’ve only been replaced by something more accessible, the online space we call the internet. I still do like magazines though; I mean…how else am I going to tape up a picture of Chris Hemsworth to my wall while I masturbate?
Yeah, magazines ARE still pretty useful ;)
So enjoy this cover ’cause we’ve got plenty of sexy content (aka dirty pictures) to quench your thirst baby!
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Let’s Have Some Fun…on the Phone.
Christmas Cutie Squirts
Christmas is just a couple of days away and we’re kinda, sorta in the spirit. Are you? Enjoy this video we dug up and call us up for some nasty conversation! Drinking an adult beverage is highly encouraged. xo
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I Don’t Know About You…
but we LOVE tits. Big titties. Juggs. Melons. Boobs. Knockers. Dirty Pillows. Breasts. Small tits are cute, but big boobs – there’s no comparison. I love touching, caressing and squeezing my own glorious titties when I’m on a hot phone sex call. I love pinching my nipples too when they’re extra sensitive (like around the time when my Aunt Flo is about to arrive. I get super horny around that time too. TMI?).
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In Honor of Star Wars – CALL 1-900-HOT-JEDI
We all know by now that this is a joke…right? Well it didn’t used to be (900 phone numbers were real). But we seriously can’t get enough, we HAVE to collect ANY & ALL phone sex-related humor out there. It’s our job and we’re constantly amused ;)
May the force be with you!